6.18.2003

it's been a while.
note the timestamp on the post--or rather, don't, as there is no "you" reading this. that's reassuring: i manage to still keep thiw low-pro. but for how long will i remain content to fly as it were below the radar?
but yes, the timestamp. rain falls outside and i wearily, tensely, tap tap out thoughts. if i go to bed, i have to sleep, and i'll have more creepy dreams. they're creepy even when they're not really that odd:
a) M marrying her honey, who is suddenly japanese and short, and gives her a ring of telescoping curlyhaired golden dolls. i arrive late, not having been told about the ceremony, am confused but of course pleased for her.
b) someone is coercively feeding me cheddar cheese, the extra-sharp kind, in big chunky bits. it's disgusting. oh, of course, i think, i'm vegan and so i don't like cheddar cheese. it's a pedestrian variety regardless.

two weeks tomorrow!
two weeks of new york. two weeks of no job. do i have a breaking point? is it close?
it would be nice to have a propper-up right about now.

it would also be nice to have a close female friend who wanted to pursue foot modeling with me. that would somehow make the idea a lot more palatable. SG stated, and rightly so, that the whole thing might be gross and exploitative. she's right, but i can't buck the thought that $200 for an evening of work is worth it.

ini wrote nice flattering things about me in his blog. i am so easily pleased. he also wrote (and said) that i remind him of his ex-girlfriend... hmm...

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